There used to be comfort in knowing that Steve Kornacki's over-caffeinated projections and our frantic fascination with Miami-Dade County would only last one night. Dire vote-counting stress typically begins on November
3 and reaches some conclusion, for better or worse, by EOD. But that small sliver of ease has crumbled with the 2020 presidential election.
As of Wednesday afternoon, millions of votes in key battleground states including Wisconsin, Pennsylvania, Michigan, and Nevada are still being counted. Kornacki has settled in with a dozen more espresso shots and it appears election night stress will be following us through the rest of the week. The ever-changing nature of the results is testing everyone's patience, including those who broadcast their anxiety on Twitter.
Scrolling through social media, everyone seems to be sharing their coping mechanisms. Monica Lewinsky confessed to purchasing a pack of cigarettes. Questlove began a perfectly timed Schitt's Creek binge-watch. And I've been feverishly switching between CNN and Hallmark Christmas programming. Jimmy Kimmel aptly summed up this waiting period last night, tweeting: "This is like being awake during your own surgery." No one was built for this chaos, but the anesthesia is wearing off and survival mode has kicked in.
Ahead, some tweets to make you feel less alone as the world faces an inevitable period of waiting, scrolling, and watching for Kornacki to blink.
God, I love the first night of Election Week. So festive. We broke out the traditional stress ball garlands and I’m going to carve the Xanax in about 20 minutes.
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) November 4, 2020
This show sucks
— Andy Cohen (@Andy) November 4, 2020
the way I didn’t get NO type of sleep............. pic.twitter.com/h7IBvgW4Or
— HOOD VOGUE is tired of poverty (@itskeyon) November 4, 2020
I feel like I got drunk at a party, went to sleep, and now I’m awake and pissed people are still at my house.
Idk if this analogy makes sense to anyone else but I’m le tired
— Linz DeFranco (@LinzDeFranco) November 4, 2020
A lot of your friends, family, and timeline will be particularly on edge today and the next few days. Please proceed with compassion. This election cycle is soul sucking.
To those riddled with anxiety just like I am: you are not alone. Let’s breathe. Stay safe. ?
— Mica Burton (@MicaBurton) November 3, 2020
The human body was not made to expend this much energy thinking about Pennsylvania.
— Stephen Colbert (@StephenAtHome) November 4, 2020
— ziwe (@ziwe) November 3, 2020
nate silver’s projections failed to predict something biden’s team projected internally all along—that I’d be stress eating a chili cheese dog over the kitchen sink in a rental house at 12 AM PT.
— ????? ?????? (@calebsaysthings) November 4, 2020
I don’t know what to do so I’m just posting this again. pic.twitter.com/ilWwgecaSR
— billy eichner (@billyeichner) November 4, 2020
I’ve learned that you have to send white people to college or else.
— amber ruffin (@ambermruffin) November 4, 2020
— chrissy teigen (@chrissyteigen) November 4, 2020
Me yesterday: Obviously we’re not going to have final election results on election night.
— BachShitCray (@Bach_ShitCray) November 4, 2020
Me tonight on #ElectionNight: pic.twitter.com/E5DK7H8xfT
Simultaneously monitoring election results and Domino's tracker is quite stressful.
— Todd Barry (@toddbarry) November 3, 2020
Watching Steve Kornacki like I watch a flight attendant so I’ll know when it’s time to panic
— blaire erskine (@blaireerskine) November 4, 2020
honestly i've had less anxiety waiting on the results of a pregnancy test
— Whitney Cummings (@WhitneyCummings) November 3, 2020
I’m stressed just like everybody else but my favorite thing these last few elections is seeing all the historic firsts happening down ballot pic.twitter.com/yWYqNxlKY7
— Kevin Panetta (@kevinpanetta) November 4, 2020
*nods* pic.twitter.com/YNl1Z910tX
— Books and Wine (@booksandwine76) November 4, 2020
Watching Uncut Gems to relax
— Zack Bornstein (@ZackBornstein) November 4, 2020
What time is it? It feels like a million o'clock
— Kumail Nanjiani (@kumailn) November 4, 2020
#ElectionDay: If you woke up feeling anxious today, you are not alone. But we will get through this and experience better days ahead.
— COMMON (@common) November 3, 2020